How to teach your child to overcome obstacles

It’s inevitable that at some point your child will encounter challenges as they grow and mature. As much as we might want to protect our children from hurt or disappointment, it’s our responsibility to give them the tools they need to overcome hurdles and bounce back from setbacks. Doing so will boost their self-esteem and confidence in their ability to achieve things despite the challenges along the way. This sixth form in Oxfordshire explores ways you can teach your child to overcome obstacles. 

Show resilience yourself

Children learn a lot by watching how their parents react to difficulties. If your child sees you approaching challenges with optimism and determination, and surmounting them to achieve something you want, they’ll be more likely to adopt the same attitude. When you face an obstacle, use it as a chance to discuss what’s happening with your child and brainstorm solutions together, making sure to frame hurdles in a positive light. 

Keep a sense of perspective

Help your child keep things in perspective by explaining that people don’t always get everything they want, even if they do try hard, but that it doesn’t have to be a disaster. Point out that even if they fail at something, there’s usually another opportunity around the corner. Being able to keep the big picture in mind will help prevent your child from catastrophising and thinking that their whole life is awful because one thing has gone wrong. Encourage them to reframe failure as a learning opportunity wherever possible. 

Push them out of their comfort zone

Trying new things and embracing new experiences will boost your child’s confidence and self-esteem. Encourage them to take small steps out of their comfort zone to test their abilities and help them realise that they can do many different things. Those small steps might lead to bigger steps and overcoming larger hurdles, improving their belief in themselves in the process. 

Choose positive role models

If your child is facing a difficult situation, it can help to point out people who’ve been in the same position and overcome adversity. This is especially effective if your example is someone they admire, such as a football player or a favourite teacher. You could also point out which of their peers has faced similar challenges and how they worked through it. This will reassure your child that they too can tackle obstacles head-on and either emerge triumphant or learn something valuable from the experience. 

Encouraging our children to have a growth mindset, rather than retreating from challenges, will set them up well for the many hurdles they’ll face in life.