Why ‘Bad Moms’ made me feel good

Bad Moms – the chick-mom flick starring Mila Kunis as an over-tired, over-worked, over-stressed mom – was on my 'must watch' movie list since I first saw the trailer. Of course, movies in theatres post Little Man are as frequent as leap years, but being a mom and hearing so much about this one, I made a date with myself and went to see it.

I'm glad I did. OK, so it wasn't an Oscar-winning, heart-stopping, historically significant film; but yes, it touched a chord somewhere. Heck everywhere! Because it said what it had to say, no holds barred. It didn't make motherhood out to be this oh-so-amazing thing (of course it is) but it is also EXHAUSTING, MIND-NUMBING and BLOODY TOUGH! That's the reality of parenting (babies/toddlers/pre-schoolers/tweens/teens) and that's what Kunis and her fellow moms represented.


motherhood meme


It made me, as a Mom, not feel so guilty/ pathetic/ horrible/ hopeless. Emotions ALL mums go through, as Kunis said, at least once a day. I call it Momguilt. It made me realise that it's not always about getting your shit together as a mum, but allowing the shit to fall apart sometimes, and not taking you down with it.

In the first half, when Kunis was (trying to be) the 'perfect' mom, she failed. She was always late, always stressed, always tired. Her kids were just an extension of her. But when she couldn't take it anymore and decided to 'quit', and just be a human mom who will do her best and do anything for her kids, but also accept that she is not superwoman – that's when things began to fall into place. There were smiles all around, her kids became their own individuals (more independent, yet more chilled out) and life wasn't about meeting deadlines or being places all the time, but about enjoying the moments in between.


Jill Churchill motherhood quote


Indeed, school and education and growing up shouldn't be all about homework, test scores and extra-curricular activities; it should also be about learning to be kind and helpful and a good human being. Childhood should be about being a kid, not an adult!
 

life quote


A line that summed it all up was 'Being a good mom today is impossible'. There are far too many expectations, demands, rules. Too many (conflicting) points of view. Too much emphasis on perfection. Too much judgement. It's just never enough. You could take your kids to one more class, make them from-scratch meals everyday, be the mum who is everywhere, all the time.
 

parenting meme


Or, you could be the not-so-perfect mum who feels its okay to give your kids a happy meal sometimes, or let them stay up late and watch a movie with you, or not attend every bake sale and every game and every school event, because you need some 'me-time' too sometimes and just want to lounge at home. Alone. Heck, you need a time-out!

So, yes, Bad Moms is not a bible for the over-achieving mom, or the stuck-to-a-routine mom, or the mom who wants to be superhuman. But I'd say it's a definite thumbs-up for the real mom, who sees imperfections with rose-tinted glasses. Cheers!

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I've linked this post with #coolmumclub 

Mummuddlingthrough

 

9 Responses

  1. Nice one , Nicole. I need to see the movies now😀

  2. A friend recommended me the movie- she watched it with her mom… And now you write about it too!!! Now I have to watch it!! Great post as usual!

  3. I haven’t watched this yet and am so curious as have heard a lot about – it’s great that even if it wasn’t oscar winning it made you feel good! Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub lovely xx

  4. I have not seen this film yet but i do really think that the trying to be a perfect mother causes more problems than it solves. If we can be ourselves too then the stress levels go down and things get better. #coolmumclub

  5. I’ve been on the fence about this film, there’s something about Mila Kunis’ (incredibly) beautiful baby face that made me hesitant about being able to take her seriously as a mom of tweens (She still looks 18 to me!! Like Emma Watson in Noah, that messed with my brain!). I’m glad I read your review though, it really does sound like a film I’d enjoy, so I’ll give it a go! x #coolmumclub

  6. I wasn’t sure about this film either. Part of me wanted to see it but another thought it looked a bit corny. Plus I’ll get massive husband judgement if I watch it, so I have to be sure I want to… But you’ve sort of sold it to me actually. I’m not sure I’ll make it to the cinema but I’ll look out for it on Google Play for a lazy solo night in. Thanks for sharing your thoughts (and also some great points about motherhood too!) #CoolMumClub

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